Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Gee, Look At Me! I'm a Diplomat!

Those who know me well are cringing at the thought of anyone, or any organization, relying on my skills in diplomacy for anything. But it seems that once children become teenagers, your life as a parent immediately changes. If you are the parent who happens to be the opposite sex of the child, then you become the diplomat. Somehow since puberty kicked in (I waged a two year stop-the-puberty campaign that ultimately failed miserably. Okay the campaign consisted of me stating to anyone who would listen, "I'm on a stop -the-puberty campaign", but still.) the father and son who have been best pals for years have been clashing more frequently.

Today's argument: The cell phone. First I should tell you that my husband was very against the cell phone. Not my son's cell phone, but his own. He hates carrying it. He forgets to turn it on and he still doesn't really know how to use it. He has killed three cell phones in four years by 1)forgetting it was in the pocket of his hoodie and throwing the hoodie in the wash, 2)losing it, 3)leaving it in a canvas bag on the floor of a baseball dugout during a tournament. One of his players spilled a sports drink on the bag rendering the cell phone useless.

My son on the other hand loves his phone. He saved up for a new fancy phone and paid for it himself. He bought a special "jacket" for it. He may be the Speilberg of cell phone movies. He always has it with him. He sends me text, picture, and video messages just so I know he loves mom. He has never lost a cell phone. Ironically I carry the replacement insurance on his cell phone rather than his father's cell phone.

I called home this afternoon to talk to the crabbiest Dad on earth. When I asked him what was wrong he told me that our son had lost his cell phone. He was extremely put out that he had to contact our cell phone provider to put a hold on the phone so that, as he put it, "some kid at school doesn't find it and put 10,000 minutes on it that we have to pay for". I pointed out that it is probably in our son's locker at school and that while our teenager has been surprisingly responsible about his phone, HE has lost, ruined, etc. not one but several phones. This did not improve his mood and he went from being crabbiest Dad on earth to crabbiest husband on earth.

Thank goodness for knitting. And wine.


sydney said...

Uh oh. Better keep that knitting nd wine handy. :)

Tam said...

What a hilarious story! That is SO like my husband. He has gotten more humble as the years have gone by because, more and more, the very thing he has just reamed somebody else for is the very thing he will immediately go out and do. haha

Anne said...


OK - so my son is only 5, if I start a campaign now, do you think it might succeed? Any pointers you can provide will be gratefully received...

(Mind you, I think it may already be too late - he's already mostly communicating by pointing and grunting...)

Chris said...

And men try to say women are irrational????

Jeanne said...

So which is worse? The crabbiest Dad, or the crabbiest husband? Probably depends on whether you are the kid, or the wife, right? At least you had wine.

Sheepish Annie said...

It has taken me nigh on forty years to figure out that pointing out the obvious to the male gender is never fruitful. Ever. They mean well and are really good at reaching the high shelves. But not so much with the diplomacy.

Note: I am unmarried. I tend to point out the obvious a lot.

Alisha said...

I am glad you had wine and knitting!!!

My husband is great with his cell phone(s). He never loses them....never washes them.

He can have a pair of sunglasses for 5 years. I am lucky to make it through one summer with a pair of sunglasses LOL

But let him find his shoes or favorite jeans and he is turning to me for help!!! ha!!

Me...I am not so good at cell phones. I am like your husband.....I forget to take the cell phone half the time and I have washed one. I am always miss placing it. Then I have to call with the home phone to find it.....a darn more thing for me to lose.

Guinifer said...

My 15 year old is equally scrupulous with his phone. His father, however, leaves his on the shelf in the kitchen almost more than he takes it with him - AND - he has let it sit in a puddle of ice on the floor of the car, thus destroying a lovely, one month old Razr! Umm, I guess I'm saying I can relate. Especially since I lost MINE in New Mexico this week and I am on my way out to purchase a new one this morning. (sigh). Hope your teenager finds his phone.